Does God love Transgender people?
Can a person be Christian and Transgender?
I believe the answer to both of those questions is yes, and I will explain why I think so in a future post.
Today’s guest post is from Megan H., a Transgender woman who loves God and seeks to honor him by loving others. She blogs at www.finallymegan.com and advocates for others in the Transgender community. I reached out to Megan on social media and invited her to tell her story here. I realize this is a controversial topic and not everyone will agree. But I humbly ask that you read Megan’s words with an open heart and ask yourself, “Do I truly believe God accepts everyone who loves Him?”
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I have known that I was Transgender since I was a child. I did not learn the term until I was in my 20’s, but I knew that I was different. This went so much deeper than wanting to wear dresses or play with dolls. It was a belief that I was a girl and that something was terribly wrong. Why didn’t I look like the other girls in school? Why was I being told to go sit with the boys during lessons? I was around five years old the first time I looked in the mirror and truly wondered what was wrong with me.
As I grew older, the feeling of being trapped intensified. It was a nightmare that I couldn’t escape…in fact, it got worse. I was so desperate to be who I was inside, I remember going to bed praying that God would change me. I was so devastated when I woke up and looked in the mirror and saw that nothing had been altered. It is so difficult to describe my feelings during this time, except for extreme panic and horrible confusion. There had been a mistake; this had to be a mistake. I wasn’t a boy. This wasn’t a phase, nor was I just an effeminate boy. This went down to my very core.
I grew up in a very conservative household. I was taught early on by the church that the LGBTQ+ community was disgusting and an abomination in the sight of God. Sure, I didn’t know what being Transgender meant as a child, but I did know that what I was feeling did not line up with what they were teaching me about being a Christian. So, if God despised the LGBTQ+ community, then He surely must hate me for what I was feeling, right? I knew that He was real, and so therefore I must be these things: vile, disgusting, and repulsive. The depression, even as a young child, was crippling. I loved Jesus more than words itself. I did not want to be this…thing that went against what He desired. I wanted to honor Him. If my feelings were in conflict with my faith, then I felt I had to change something.
I decided, as I grew older, than in order to be a good Christian, I needed to be as “manly” as possible. By doing this, I would become who I was supposed to be, and maybe change the way I was feeling. I would honor Christ; I would prove that I loved Him by becoming this person. I threw myself into children’s ministry at the church, and I taught theater at a Christian school. Serving God meant that I focused less on myself and more on Him, and while I was so terribly miserable, I was still able to help others. There was a war that I was waging internally, but I thought then that suppressing my feelings and ignoring them would help me overcome them. On the outside, I was this strong Christian who had all of the answers, but I was slowly drowning internally.
I met a beautiful girl, and we fell in love. We married when she was 18, and I was 20. This was the way things were supposed to be, right? We had 3 little girls and built a life together…but it was a life built on a lie I had fabricated for my own life and spirituality. As completely in love as I was with my family, I was so depressed. So depressed, in fact, that I almost took my life.
I was living a lie. I was in such a dark place. I thought that my family wouldn’t be able to cope with who I really was internally. I thought that God, who I loved more than anything, couldn’t love me, or accept me for the woman I was. I had two choices: end it all, or embrace who I really was. So I told my siblings. They were not surprised at all. My wife found out, and is now my biggest supporter. All of the lies that I had been telling myself for my entire life began to crumble away.
I began to think about all of the things I had been taught while growing up, and things that I had heard even as an adult. I thought about God, who in His unfathomable love and mercy sent His Son to die for our sins so that His people could be reunited with Him. Any person…except someone who was a part of the LGBTQ+ community? This did not make any sense. I continued to read and study, and I continued to return to the one truth that I knew for absolute certain:
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.”
This verse is so often quoted that many Christians take it for granted. I read it over and over. Jesus died so that ANYONE who believes in Him will have everlasting life. There isn’t an exception. There isn’t a “He died so that anyone except this particular group of people can live with Him forever” clause. So then if this was true (and it is), how can I be Transgender and a Christian despite what the church is teaching?
I have conversations with other Christians all the time, and most (if not all) will return to the same book of the Bible: Leviticus. Specifically, Leviticus 20:13, which discusses homosexuality. This was my area of confusion for a long time as well. So I continued to read and study. I finally came across this verse:
Galatians 3:21-25 – “Is the law then against the promises of God? Certainly not! For if there had been a law given which could have given life, truly righteousness would have been by the law. But the Scripture has confined all under sin, that the promise by faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe. But before faith came, we were kept under guard by the law, kept for the faith which would afterward be revealed. Therefore the law was our tutor to bring us to Christ, that we might be justified by faith. But after faith has come, we are no longer under a tutor.”
After I read it initially, I read it a few more times before it sank in. Hadn’t I heard before about the “Old Law,” and that Jesus came to bring us the “new law”? The old law was put into place to prepare us for Jesus, plain and simple. The old rules fell away when Jesus came to restore our relationship with the Father!
John 1:17 – “For the law was given through Moses, but God’s unfailing love and faithfulness came through Jesus Christ.”
Jesus came to earth to show us God’s unfailing love and faithfulness. Not bound by rituals or blood sacrifice as was given to us (necessary at the time) by Moses, but to forge something new.
While there are others, the verse I wanted to share most of all is this:
John 13:34 – “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”
This is our new commandment. This is the thing that we are to do-love one another. Not “judge one another”, not criticize or verbally abuse other people because they are challenging what we have been taught our entire lives. Love. One. Another.
So what now? There are still uncertainties in my life. I still have struggles; I am not the “model Christian.” I am still growing and learning, and will until the day that I die. I have reconciled my Christianity with my being a Transgender woman. It does not exempt me, it does not make me less of a person or Christian. I am one of Christ’s children, and nothing or no one can take that away. I still want to honor Him with my actions. I chose to love the unlovable. I was one of those unlovable people until I accepted Christ. Maybe that is why I am here, why I have gone through all of this. Maybe I am put into this position so that I can show Christ’s love to those in the LGBT+ community.
All I know for certain is that I am not forsaken, lost, or unwanted. I have a Savior who wants me, Transgender or otherwise. That, to me, is everything.